软苏格拉底

I still remember that time when my ex-boyfriend and I were out and about, and suddenly it started pouring rain. We didn't have an umbrella, so we had to make a mad dash for home. At the time, I thought the weather was just awful, like the whole world was conspiring against us. But when we finally made it back home, took off our soaked clothes, and sat down on the couch, I suddenly found my emotions shifting from frustration to irritation. I started complaining about why he hadn't brought an umbrella, why he hadn't checked the forecast beforehand. Why, why, why? I realized that this is one of the quirks of relationships. When we're alone, facing difficulties, we tend to think it's because of our own inadequacies, bad luck, or the environment. But when we're with someone else, we start blaming them – this is our subconscious 'deflection of responsibility'. Maybe that's why we often feel like being in a relationship makes it easier to pick fights and complain. Because we transfer our emotions and responsibilities onto our partner. So, when we're caught in the rain with someone, we need to learn not only to face difficulties together but also to deal with our own emotions and responsibilities. Of course, this doesn't mean we shouldn't complain or blame our partner. We just need to reflect on whether we're complaining about the weather or our partner. Are we blaming them or ourselves?